So life was humming along as it had for years: jobs, kids, friends ... normal stuff. The highs and lows - weddings, graduations, passing on of parents - these all occurred as they should and wove their way into the grand and glorious tapestry of life. But the daily wake up in the morning, brush your teeth, do the next thing life continued to hum. Steady, predictable, comfortable.
But recently a certain day arrived and everything changed. Unlike a big event that comes and then leaves, an unwelcome visitor showed up that would change the day to day picture forever.
We learned that the dreaded C-word had invaded Rick's body and therefore our home. We reeled in the face of this news. The steady, predictable and comfortable suddenly felt shaky and uncertain. We wanted to say "um, no thanks," - turn back the clock and bar the door, stuff like that.
Instead, God taught us the meaning of "I AM."
Lord, please give us wisdom here! I AM.
Lord, we're scared; please be near us! I AM.
Lord, are you here in all this? Are you here in the doctor's office? On the radiation table? In the waiting room? Will you give our children peace? Please give us strength!
I AM.
We've learned the futility of looking ahead - of allowing fear to rob us of the beauty of right now. He is right here, in this very moment. "I AM." His grace is sufficient, His presence is sweet, His wisdom is trustworthy and His love is our comfort - in this moment. What does the future hold? We've learned not to even wonder. This very moment is good, because it is filled with Him. Even in the tough stuff.
And we know our great I AM - our Father of the present moment - will be just as sufficient and sweet and trustworthy and comforting in each and every moment to come. No matter what.
Right now - with Him - is a peaceful place.